It was the holy trinity of hot boys.” The epitome of the Harvard stereotype, he belongs in a Ralph Lauren ad.It’s cute that he thinks his country is superior to America, because chances are you think so too.
You saw him at the occasional entryway meeting during Opening Days, but now he's holed up in his room and his HSA laundry has been sitting in front of his door for the last week. He loves it, he’s proud of it, and he wants you to know it. The sad thing is that he’s better at math than you are; he’s even taking the harder class. The Score Dropper Could he be any prouder of his SAT score?
But somehow, he always forgets to mention that he’s only on the club team… The Recruited Athlete Never without an entourage, this boy lives and breathes his sport. At the drop of a hat, this boy will recite his scores better than most people can say the Pledge of Allegiance.
He needs his team and his team gear like we mortals need air. Not to mention that he has his resume always on hand and business cards stuffed in all his back pockets. We’re all in the same boat, so please find a new topic before we cast you adrift. The Foreigner He has the best accent and you hate that he keeps asking you questions, because all you want to do is hear him talk.
If you confront him without his equally tall and muscular teammates, he’s a deer in headlights who’s simply lost. As soon as you meet, he rattles off his four classes and proceeds to drone on about how difficult his four p-sets were last night. He could talk about quantum mechanics and you would feign interest so that he doesn’t shut up.
Given the fact that we have shaken hands with over a hundred guys since setting foot at Harvard, we feel as though we’ve gotten a thorough first impression of all of you. With his popped collar and snide look, this ultra preppy guy takes the cake.
Here’s a list of our favorite categories for the lads—try to figure out which mark you left on us ladies. The Budding Alcoholic The stench of vodka wafts to you from at least seven feet away. This guy hasn’t had a sober night since he arrived here. He’s so preoccupied with figuring out how to get punched that he probably won’t notice you waving at him. The Guy Who’s Three Years Older Than Everyone Where have you been? Somehow, his gap year turned into a couple of years…but you keep him in your contacts because he can buy alcohol and you can’t. The Guy Who’s Three Years Younger Than Everyone At first you probably thought he was a late bloomer—until you found out he’s actually just fifteen.
He’s probably even made a few pit stops at UHS, but it’s really a point of pride for him. Somehow, his brain just developed a lot better and faster than yours.
If you can’t fall asleep Thursday night because of the shouting outside, it’s likely his fault. The Hermit Chances are he’s signed up for CS50, Ec 10, Gov 20, and Math 55 without realizing what he got himself into. The Club Sport Athlete This guy talks about his sport all the time. You make sure to watch your language in front of him and might even feel the need to teach him about the birds and bees.
When you’re around him, you fall into your niche and forget the fact that you met just two weeks ago.